Hope
by Nytel
Summary: Kara knew that the overwhelming knowledge of what had happened had hit some people right away, but for others, like her, it had taken longer. K/L. Set in Season 1


**A/N:** Written for the prompt 'viper cockpit'. This is set between _Six Degrees of Separation_ and _Flesh and Bone._ It has been a very long time since I wrote season 1 fic or even watched season 1 episodes, so I hope I remembered the timeline and other details correctly.

**Hope**

For each person in the fleet it was different: the amount of time it took for the enormity of it to sink. The time it took for them to realize that they were never going home, that billions of people, the majority of the human population, had been completely wiped out. Kara knew that the overwhelming knowledge of what had happened had hit some people right away, but for others, like her, it had taken longer.

Maybe it was because she was a trained soldier. She hadn't let herself think about it because the entire idea was too terrifying. But then weeks went by and it became harder and harder to avoid confronting the truth. Although no one said anything, Kara was certain it was the same for other people aboard Galactica. Just two nights ago she'd heard Racetrack sobbing in her bunk and Crash trying to comfort her. Although they'd been mostly quiet, she'd caught enough of their conversation to know what it had been about. Racetrack had lost a fiancé and a younger sister, and for some reason it had decided to hit her full force that night.

For Kara the truth had hit her full force today. Nothing spectacular had brought it on, no major event, no near death experience… it'd just been another normal day on Galactica, or at least a normal day since Cottle had finally released her from his hellhole of an infirmary.

The problem was that after busting up her knee she had very little to keep her occupied. Lee had taken over teaching the nuggets, she couldn't fly, couldn't run, couldn't work out… All she could do was the minimal amount of physio Cottle had laid out for her each day. Hell, she wasn't even allowed to drink Tyrol's crappy excuse for alcohol because of the painkillers she was on. Unfortunately, this left her with a lot of free time and Kara was certain it was all the nothingness that had made her unable to avoid it any longer. She'd been trying to catch some rack time after dinner, and just as she had been about to fall asleep… wham.

In some ways though, she thought maybe she was one of the lucky ones. She hadn't really lost anyone because she'd had no one to lose. Zak was already gone, her mother had died from cancer, and her father had disappeared when she was little. Sure she'd had friends, but they had really just been drinking buddies. She had no one to miss, but for some reason she suddenly felt completely lost and hopeless, and the idea of the future she now had horrified her.

When she'd been unable to fall asleep even after hours of trying, Kara had made her way down to the flight deck. She hadn't been there since she'd helped Tyrol and Lee check out the raider they had gained after her crash landing on the moon.

Once she arrived at the hangar deck she saw what was going to be her new viper, stored in the far back corner of the hangar. Slowly, she had made her way over to it. It was late enough that the deck crew was minimal and those who were there ignored her, assuming they'd even noticed her in the first place.

Climbing inside the viper was difficult, especially with her knee. She was forced to ditch her crutches at the bottom of the ladder and it was a combination of sheer determination and upper body strength that got her to the top.

As she lowered herself into the cockpit, she tried to think about how good it felt to be in a viper again, instead of thinking about everything else. Unfortunately it didn't work. Kara's mind was once again engulfed by the thoughts of what had happened, and how sketchy the future seemed.

She wasn't sure how long she sat there, but at some point she heard footsteps, which were loud enough to break through the haze of her thoughts. She wasn't sure why a knuckle dragger would be headed over to this corner so late at night; she couldn't imagine they had any maintenance to do on the unused vipers. Then she realized it wasn't a member of the deck crew.

"Kara?" She heard her name fill the otherwise quiet air. For a brief moment she wondered if ignoring Lee would cause him to leave. It was doubtful.

She heard him stop next to the viper, and although she was slouched down in the seat of the viper and unable to see him, she could only imagine the way that he was probably staring up at the cockpit.

"Kara," Lee said again, more slowly this time. "What are you doing down here?"

She sighed. "Couldn't sleep," she answered truthfully, though she wasn't planning on telling him why. After a few seconds Kara heard the sound of Lee getting on the ladder and she rolled her eyes. Only he would need to physically check on her to make sure she was all right.

The next thing she knew Lee standing on the top step, leaning against one of the handrails and looking down at her. "Everything okay?" He questioned, his eyebrows raised in concern.

"Why the frak are you here anyway?" She countered, hoping to evade his question.

Lee shrugged. "I finished up the flight schedule and I was going to get some rack time when I noticed you weren't in your bunk. I checked the mess hall and the rec room but you weren't there either, so I tried here."

"I don't need a babysitter, Lee," she told him angrily, even though she wasn't really mad at him. "I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself."

Lee sighed as he took a seat on the top step, obviously not planning on leaving. "Seriously, Kara, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she lied, breaking eye contact with him and focusing her gaze on the controls of her new viper. She pretended to be checking them all over, hoping Lee would just forget it and go. However, she'd forgotten that he could be almost as stubborn as she was. He sat there beside her, waiting; probably either for her to completely blow up at him, or to talk.

Kara toyed with both ideas for several minutes until one won out.

"It's really all gone, isn't it?" She questioned, her voice barely audible. She didn't look away from the flight controls as she talked. "Everything we knew, that we grew up with, expecting to have around for the rest of our lives… it's destroyed. We're never going to get it back."

"No, we're not," Lee agreed solemnly, sympathy lacing his voice. And although the truth was hard to hear, she was glad he wasn't trying to sugarcoat it for her.

"Hell, Lee," she said, her voice becoming shaky. "What's the chances of us even making it to Earth? Your dad knows the way, but with the cylons dogging our every move, and trying to wipe out what's left of us… we barely even stand a chance at getting through this."

"I know."

"And us… our chances are even worse. We're viper pilots, we're out there every day, basically just waiting for one frakking toaster to get a lucky shot in and take us out."

Kara bit her bottom lip between her teeth and leaned her head back against the seat while closing her eyes, trying to keep her errant emotions reigned in. "So what do we do?" Kara asked him, her eyes still closed. "Do we just keep fighting until we can't anymore? Is that what life is going to be like from now until we die?"

When Lee's hand closed on her shoulder and squeezed, it startled her and she angled her head to look at him. She hoped he wouldn't see the moisture threatening to spill from her now open eyes, but knowing Lee, even if he did see it he wouldn't say anything.

"No," he told her earnestly. "That's not all it's going to be. Yes, we are going to be fighting the cylons for each step of our journey towards Earth. Yes, it's going to be hard, and people are going to die. We will be fighting, but not until we can't, just until we don't need to anymore.

"However long it takes for us to find a new home, to find Earth, things will be hard. I don't doubt that for a second. But what we're doing… we have a purpose, one much bigger and important than just you and me. We are going to save humanity. The cylons may have destroyed most of us, but not all. And by finding a new home, and by simply surviving, we will be beating them."

It took a few moments for what Lee had said to fully sink in, but when it did Kara couldn't help but give him a weak smile. The passion and conviction behind his words were hard to ignore. Maybe he was right; maybe they still had plenty of reasons to keep on fighting…

He smiled back at her.

"Well," Kara said slowly. "I guess I better not be giving up on my physio any time soon."

The look on Lee's face turned to one of confusion. "Huh?"

She grinned. "You know, if I've still got to help save humanity and all that…"

Lee grinned broadly and the atmosphere lightened considerably. "I guess so…" He agreed. Then he looked down over the edge of the ladder, undoubtedly to the crutches that were leaning against it. "How the hell did you get up here by the way?"

Kara laughed. "With my magic Starbuck powers of course," she said, her voice laced with sarcasm.

Lee shook his head in disbelief. "Would you perhaps like the help of my special Apollo powers to get back down?"

Kara debated telling him to go to hell, but her leg had fallen asleep and she hadn't exactly worked out an exit strategy before climbing up.

"I promise no one else is here to witness," Lee added quietly, knowing her all too well.

Kara sighed. "Fine, but only because you seem so determined. Not because I actually need any help," she stated.

Lee lifted his hands in the air. "Of course, I never thought you actually needed help for one second."

Kara smiled as she allowed Lee to pull her up into a standing position and help her out of the cockpit and onto the ladder. The descent wasn't exactly pleasant and Lee ended up assisting her much more than she would have liked, but she did make it to the bottom unscathed.

Lee grabbed her crutches and presented them to her with a flourish that made her roll her eyes. "Come on, almighty Apollo," she said, beginning to hobble towards the main hallway while he fell in step beside her. "I gotta get to bed or else I'll be late for the morning briefing. And knowing our uptight CAG, he'll have my ass."

"Yeah," Lee agreed. "That guy's such a bastard."

They both laughed and Kara felt infinitely better than she had earlier. She glanced sideways at Lee, unable to keep from smiling again. Maybe things weren't so hopeless after all.

The End


End file.
